Over the four-day weekend I slept for 48 hours.

Nothing sounds fun, or even interesting. I am unmotivated and uninspired.

It is time to reevaluate the meds, I suppose. I am not looking forward to the chemistry expiriments until the proper cocktail is found. But, I know I want to get better.

So, even though I am kind of feeling like shit again, at least I know what is happening to me, I know why I am suddenly in such a lull. I know.

I am not crazy or lazy or worthless. I am just depressed. Again. But it isn’t nearly as bad as it was before I was undiagnosed. And I know what is happening to me. I cannot overstate what a comfort — and what a victory — that is.

I have a doctor’s appointment schedule for Thursday at 2:00 p.m. to discuss meds. I am taking care of myself.

That alone has gotten me out of bed.